Liars' League

Runners by David McGrath

Runners MP3

Read by Paul Clarke and David McGrath

‘Two hundred grand, chaps,’ he was shouting when I spotted him. He wore a Santa hat, mistletoe pinned to it above the forehead. ‘That’s what I make a year. Two hundred thousand pounds. Actually, wait just one minute. Wait just one minute.’

He put his finger to his lip, pretending to ponder. Shoplifter acting.

 

Gillespie by Georgie Codd

Gillespie

Read by Camila Fiori

I only went to The Lodge for the money, nothing else. It wasn't ideal, but it was something.

From the outside, if you ignored the protesters' camp, with all those tents and banners, it looked like a five-star hotel, or somebody's stately home. On the inside things weren't so high class. It smelt strange, like a cleaning cupboard or hospital hallway. The strongest scented candles couldn't mask it.

The Subcontractor's Assistant by Gawain Griffiths

The Subcontractor's Assistant

Read by Peter Noble

After I died I managed to get an entry level position as an assistant angel, wingless class.  It was a good job to have. In my day they didn't just give you your wings, you had to earn them; and dying half way through December meant I was earning them the hard way, carrying out miracles. The biggest miracles God does himself, the smaller ones however he feeds down to the angels, subcontracting them out to the lowest bidder. The winged angels in turn, being too busy with all their flying and such, feed down the work to their assistants. Which was where I came in. 

A Fortnight of Frost by Rebecca Skipwith

A Fortnight of Frost

Read by Louisa Gummer 

"Still with us, Mr C?"

He surfaces into a dapple of light, an orchestra of tweeting. It is a slow hard awakening, through sickly layers of recognition: his garden in Reigate, no. A Sunday dragnet of marital sheets in Croydon, window flung wide, no. Not for decades.

Fingers press at his wrist and lift his arm. Pins and needles rush his skin.

 

Hungry Boys by Jim Minton

Hungry Boys

Read by Sarah Feathers

I remember I was really hungry. I was with Kwame – he’s one of the boys at the club. I was helping him to hold a paintbrush properly. He’s got learning difficulties; some thing which means he’s not really developed.

We were leaning over the workbench together and I had hold of his wrist. It was so thin, like holding a drumstick. He couldn’t hold the brush himself so I helped him dip it in and out of the paint. We watched the black hairs going into the white of the paint – it was like whipped cream, and I was licking my lips thinking about it – even though the chemical painty smell was strong, it just looked so ... delicious.

Angels & Demons stories chosen for Tuesday December 18th!

PLEASE NOTE: OUR CHRISTMAS EVENT IS NOW ON TUESDAY DECEMBER 18th, NOT TUESDAY DECEMBER 11th AS PREVIOUSLY ADVERTISED.

We've been to hell and back to bring you a heavenly host of stories for our Angels & Demons event next Tuesday December 18th at the Phoenix.

Yes, we know it's not our usual second Tuesday of the month. That's because our venue, The Phoenix, had a little booking malfunction, and they assure us that they are very, VERY sorry for messing us (and you) around. But then again, the 18th is a week nearer to Christmas so the Yuletide spirit will flow even more freely than usual, and that's pretty free!

Anyway, our five glorious stories feature characters both naughty and nice, including a pissed banker, a wingless angel, an elderly accountant, a rickshaw-puller and an Angel of Death - plus a LOT of fried chicken and swearing. And the winners are:

The Subcontractor's Assistant by Gawain Griffiths, read by Peter Noble *NEW AUTHOR*
Gillespie by Georgie Codd, read by Camila Fiori *NEW AUTHOR* 
A Fortnight of Frost by Rebecca Skipwith, read by Louisa Gummer *NEW AUTHOR* 
Runners by David McGrath, read by the author and the mighty Paul Clarke *NEW AUTHOR* 
Hungry Boys by Jim Minton, read by Sarah Feathers

Because we're full of the joys of Christmas giving here at Liars' League, if you have read for us or had a story read at an LL event this year, you can drink for free (or until the tab runs out) on December 18th! Plus this month we'll have an extra-special edition of our (in)famous book quiz, with a ton of books to give away, including titles by Deborah Moggach, Robert Rankin, David Peace, and Amitav Ghosh. 

Finally, the Liars' League Most Valuable Player Awards will also be announced, for the hardest-working author and actor of the year!

The night will begin at 7.30pm (doors open at 7pm) on Tuesday December 18th. Tickets cost £5 on the door (cash only, no advance booking) and seating is unreserved - so it's a good idea to get there a bit early if you want a good table. Here's the Facebook event if you want to RSVP.

The venue is downstairs at:
The Phoenix
37 Cavendish Square 
London 
W1G 0PP

(The Phoenix is 5 minutes' walk from Oxford Circus tube station, which is on the Victoria, Bakerloo and Central lines)

Map here