One. Mark is pissed on by a dog.
A dog has been running around the scrubby grass of Leicester Square Gardens since Mark and his friends arrived. At first, it tried to eat the scraps of their burger king burgers before turning its attention to other a group of tourists. Mark’s teenage girlfriend watches as it hungrily takes ice cream cones from their hands. A couple of shirtless labourers, soaking up hazy rays, taunt the dog when it tries to eat their sandwiches. None of Marks’ friends notice when the dog trots up to Mark, sniffs his back and cocks its leg. They hear the piss hitting his bomber jacket before he feels it soaking through. His reaction – jumping up and swearing – is slightly delayed, and the reaction of his friends – laughing loud schoolgirl laughs – doesn’t happen immediately either.